Toaster Rage

[TTony]

Let him eat bread.

[limbicsystem]

When you need a big fuck-off 3kw grill instead of a piddling little toaster?

Yeah but it toasts it properly


I'm amazed in this day and age you can't by loafs.... or is it loaves? Shit I've gone dyslexic!

Anyway bread that's already toasted that you just bung in the microwave for 20 seconds


That idea has been copywritten by limbicsystem corporation btw. So don't try and steal it

[FBF]

What gives me toaster rage are those fucking conveyer belt toasters they have in hotels which seem to always be set so that putting the toast through once gives you warm bread and putting it through twice gives you charcoal.

This.

I stayed in hotels on busines this year around 45 nights and I can confirm this description is 100% accurate across the nation. There just has to be a better way, they leave those grills running red hot for all the breakfast hours when they are used a fraction of the time (and even then fail per the above)... we need a better hotel toaster... I'm going to invent on Dragons' Den... How hard can it be to invent a decent toaster?

[chillidoggy]

Strat or toaster. Strat or toaster. Strat or toaster. Yup, that's a tough one.

+1 on the hotel conveyor belt toasters. I do however believe there's a speed control on them somewhere, but by the time you've got that right, it's time for lunch.

The other one in hotels that is totally shite, is the egg boiler. You lower the egg into the boiling water, then wonder when it's done because there's never any bloody timer available. And invariably there's the remains of someone else's failed attempt languishing in the machine.

[longtallronnie]

What about those speedy toasty things they use in Subway? God I could murder a meatball maranananana sub.

[octatonic]

What about those speedy toasty things they use in Subway? God I could murder a meatball maranananana sub.

[ChrisJordan]

+1 on the hotel conveyor belt toasters. I do however believe there's a speed control on them somewhere, but by the time you've got that right, it's time for lunch.

Yes there is a speed controller on them, set to an optimum before the onset of customers. The problem is that you get some pleb, who wants his or her toast really quick, turning the speed up, which results in the bread not getting toasted to satisfaction. Said pleb puts the bread back in, "because the toaster isn't working correctly", which comes out as carbon crunchies. FFS!

[chillidoggy]

Yes there is a speed controller on them, set to an optimum before the onset of customers. The problem is that you get some pleb, who wants his or her toast really quick, turning the speed up, which results in the bread not getting toasted to satisfaction. Said pleb puts the bread back in, "because the toaster isn't working correctly", which comes out as carbon crunchies. FFS!

I've just burst out laughing at that one, sat in the car whilst waiting for the missus to finish shopping. People looking at me a bit strangely!

[monquixote]

What gives me toaster rage are those fucking conveyer belt toasters they have in hotels which seem to always be set so that putting the toast through once gives you warm bread and putting it through twice gives you charcoal. I am now working on a technique to throw the bread about half way into the toaster on the second time through to deliver perfectly toast, but I need more work on my delivery as it is still too hit and miss.

The main thing that pisses me off is people who think they are magical toast fountains and bloody steel your toast as it pops out believing it is just part of the magical river of toast not something you just put in and then wandered off to get some bacon.

[A5D5E5]

The main thing that pisses me off is people who think they are magical toast fountains and bloody steel your toast as it pops out believing it is just part of the magical river of toast not something you just put in and then wandered off to get some bacon.

Yes, very annoying. I would suggest following such a person back to their table and then taking one of their sausages or a bit of bacon in exchange.